Japanese lessons

Ken Tanaka and Remi February shows you how to speak fluent Japanese without saying a word...






Makes one wonder why we have to go to all those Japanese language lessons.

Ninja Warrior

Singapore TV is currently screening 'Ninja warrior' every Thursdays on MediaCorp channel 5 at 8.30 p.m. Better known as 'Sasuke' in Japan, it is a sports challenge show that pits participants against a series of grueling obstacles. Out of a 100 participants, only a handful get through to the 3rd stage. It is rather exciting to see athletes challenge for top honors in this program.

There is this thing that annoys me most about the Singaporean broadcast. Why of all names did they have to choose such a tacky and crass title such as 'Ninja warrior'? The CG animated program opening sequence features katana carrying ninjas flying and scuttling across the TV screen. The announcer on the TV ad makes things worse with his cheap and often overused imitation of the Japanese accent: "Don't miss this week's episode of Ninja warriaaaaah!"

I don't blame the Singaporeans. The American producers of the show probably named it this way. I suppose this highlights the ignorance of our western counterparts. Why do they always have to associate Japan with the ninja, samurai or geisha? It would be similar to Asians who think that all Americans are cowboys herding cows and smoking Marlboro.

Nevertheless, 'Sasuke' is entertaining and it has given me some slight motivation to put on my running shoes. I'll save the part where I open my front door for another episode.

Sugamo

This shopping street is often referred to as 'Obasan no Harajuku'(granny's harajuku). You may well know that Harajuku is the fashion capital for Japanese teenage girls. Sugamo however, is the place to be for grandmothers aged 60 and above.

There is a particular store along this street that sells all things red, especially granny styled underpants. It's been said that red underpants give you strength and vitality, thus making it a popular purchase among senior citizens. The shop signboard in the top photo says, "元気に素敵生活" meaning "live vigorously to a wonderful life". A product endorsed by Elmo would certainly deserve a second look, shouldn't it?

Check out the online store that sells these red underpants. Do not forget to read the page headline and the product writeup at the bottom. Go to this link:

http://www.sugamo-maruji.jp/SHOP/206784/list.html

This is something you could definitely consider buying for your grandmother on her birthday or for Chinese New Year... if you are brave enough.

Lame...

I doubt anyone would want to buy them...

or is there something I didn't know? Perhaps an upcoming worldwide trend in 'la-me' (speak in french accent) styled stickers? I really don't know.

Nevertheless, that's a pretty lame name for a sticker.

English expression

I chanced upon this welcome screen of a fairly antiquated ticketing machine at my local train station while trying to add value to my SUICA card (Tokyo version of EZlink card). I hesitated in putting my card into the machine and pressing the 'English' button for fear of what may possibly turn up on the screen.

Press 'English' for English expression and you may very well see:

"An apple a day keeps the doctor away",

"Raining cats and dogs", or

"A fool and his money are soon parted"
... only to find out later than all monetary value was erased from your SUICA card.

Of course, unless you are the unsuspecting British tourist, most Singaporeans can discern such English gaffes since we are used to seeing similar ones at our neighborhood kopitiam. Even so, you can't help but snicker at such 'English expressions'.

verbal mishaps

While learning a new language, you are bound to commit a number of mistakes, sometimes rather embarrassing ones.

What I should have said:
On stage, you were difficult to pick out, see (mie-nikui)
What I said:
On stage, you were unsightly (mi-nikui)

This comes courtesy of a Singaporean friend for a presentation. He was wondering why the crowd didn't really warm up to him. This might be why.

What He should have said:
Tano-shinde ne (Please enjoy yourself)
What He said:
Shinde ne ('Shinde' means 'to die')

Randoseru

Elementary schoolkids are required to carry the Randoseru (a word imported from Holland) all through their six years of school. The wonderfully crafted leather backpack with metal fittings and buckles is actually quite nice to look at, but most people will balk at the cost. A Randoseru can cost anywhere between 25,000 yen (SGD$400) to as much as 80,000 yen (SGD$1300) depending on the quality of the bags.

Talk about expensive branded bags for primary school kids.

Smoking or smoking?

Japan has a number of rules that doesn't make a whole lot of sense sometimes. In Japan, you are prohibited by law to smoke while walking in the open. It is believed that doing so would cause a public nuisance. You are only allowed to smoke in certain designated areas (much like Singapore's yellow box) or... check this out: in restaurants.

Now this is the part where common sense and rational thought goes up in smoke. There are smoking and non-smoking sections in restaurants but almost 99% of the time, seats next to each other are separated only by a glass partition that doesn't even go up all the way to the ceiling. Most of the time you'd end up smelling of smoke while suffering from smoke inhalation. The sign should instead read: 1st hand smoking and 2nd hand smoking.

Starbucks and Mr.Donut are the only two places I know that are only non-smoking. If you intend to eat elsewhere, hold your breath.

delivery bike

There must be something about me and Japanese transportation. So far I've already blogged about trains and bicycles, and right now the topic is motorbikes. I guess there must be something unique or particular about it. Anyway here goes...

Most eateries in Japan have a motorbike that does food deliveries within the neighborhood. Foods like udon soup and sushi are difficult to transport on a typical pizza hut delivery bike, so the Japanese invented a mechanism that allows the food tray to stay horizontal even when making sharp turns.